One of the most popular advantages of being in a healthy relationship is having regular sex. However, the definition of “regular sex” varies from one couple to another and even people in the healthiest relationships just don’t have the time or energy for sex sometimes even for days and days! That’s why the question of the “normal” amount of sex is highly individual and depends on so many factors. Still, there are a few universally agreed truths on this matter, so here’s what the experts say regarding the amount of sex you should have every week.
The Numbers
While everybody would like to have sex every day, it’s often impossible. It takes time, energy, endurance, and devotion, and it’s not uncommon that today’s couples often lack one of these. Working all day long, trying to make a living, constantly being under stress and not having enough time for your partner is the cost of modern life. However, that doesn’t mean you don’t love each other – it’s just the way it is, unfortunately.
When it comes to numbers, scientists agree that more sex doesn’t necessarily equal a happy life and doing it every single day often means close to nothing. The phrase “once a week” is common when talking about sex life and a 2015 study suggests that this is the ideal amount of sex that will make you the happiest. Of course, the only thing that will make you and your significant other happier is better and more meaningful sex life, so it’s not about the frequency, but intensity and passion.
Individual Approach
Again, experts understand that sex and relationships can’t be defined in terms of numbers, so they express their observations quite carefully. More sex can make your relationship better, but no amount of it will turn a catastrophic one into something positive. Although it’s considered the most default answer to all relationship problems, it’s just a way to avoid issues and focus on other things instead of fixing them.
Of course, things can’t be taken literally. While some suggest you should have sex twice a week, others leave this decision to you. So, if you feel like it, go for it, but don’t feel too bad if you don’t – it’s as simple as that.
Improve Your Sex Life
In order to introduce more meaningful changes to your relationship, you might want to focus on the quality of your sex life instead of intensity. In other words, have as much sex as you want, but make sure it’s great and that it lasts long enough! You can start exploring new locations, learn new techniques and try to understand what works best for your partner.
Another idea you should take into consideration is adding sex toys into the mix. Most people are careful with them, while others can’t imagine sex without them. They also give you new opportunities as well. Although some don’t think about them that way, sensual men’s sex toys are something experts generally recommend since they are both stimulating and beneficial to your health.
Shift the Paradigm
As soon as you understand that how good is much more important than how often, you’ll be able to ease up on the pressure and shift the paradigm regarding the amount of sex you and your partner are having. Once or twice a week is good, but doing it every day is even better, yet having sex just for the sake of number isn’t something you want. Instead of forcing it as often as possible, your sex life should reflect that you’re in a meaningful, healthy and loving relationship that isn’t defined just by sex.